im trying to retain a sense of perspective this week. i learnt some more things about the muppeteer last night but what was most important was how fragile she is. she is so concerned about having a relationship with someone from work and this week that came home to roost as one of her colleagues made play of the fact that her ex is dating someone else from work, someone she knows and works with. she knew this and doesn't need it rubbed in her face by some boot faced old trout who has nothing else going on in her life. women can be very unkind to each other when it comes to gossip. i cant do anything but be positive, be supportive nad give her space to get her head around what she feels about it all. i want to pick her up and hug her and tell i'll take care of her but that would probably make her run a mile. she feels/knows she has had a shitty year (her words) and i think she has psycologically decided that 2008 will be better. i hope so - its not been brilliant for me relationship wise although most else has been good. im toying with the idea of asking her if she is free on saturday - even if its just to do an hour of shopping or grab a coffee. id love to suggest a long walk but my ankles are still hurting from the damned so she'd only end up carrying me!
im pleased that nearly all of the communication we had today was led by her.. as was the idea that we would meet up over xmas. i think this is important. i always make the running in relationships but she is very different from all the girls i've been out with. she likes gifts but she prefers giving them, she doesn't like being the centre of attention, she really wants to do her share of eveything. a little while ago you accused me - my northern friend 
of having it bad. well i think i learnt last night that this is a very special woman and one i want to have a relationship with but the mad desperate rush of blood to the head (and i do mean to the head..) has passed. im not in agony now when i dont get an instant reply, im not sitting waiting for texts that dont come, we are friends and we are going stay friends and maybe more as the next few weeks and months unfold. but there's no rush
i learnt something else as well - that i dont want SheWho anymore. i worried that i did but the bouncing muppeteer's natural warmth and beauty makes Her seem dull and pale by comparison. I hope im always mates with Her but the fatal love i think died last night.