if i look back over the past twelve months they have been fairly full and not a little traumatic. it started in january when i had my graduation for my doctorate - i trod the boards in my local thetare for that dear thespian! - then went off to deliver a paper at a conference and came home to furious rows with my girl. the rot had set in before then and had been simmering all over christmas - so the first half of 2007 was an attempt by both of us to patch together something that perhaps had run its course, it just took us a while to realise it. in a way 2007 was one long break-up that took until september to happen. the stress levels seem to rise over the year and this was reflected in the numerous allergic attacks that caused my lips, eye-lids or face to swell up. neither my GP nor the allergy specialists could suggest anything which i why ive been seeing a chinese dr for acupunture and herbs. and im sure it is stress because having been relatively free of trouble for a while (just very minor attacks no one would notice) a sleepless night of worry and a christmas period of doubt has left me waking this morning with a badly swollen eye i just have to try and relax today, do little and be happy with it. then it might go down before i go out to see in the new year.

the other low point of 2007 was my grandfather's illness: he had a stroke (brought on by a prank call from a unknown teenager threatening to kill him) which landed him in hospital and he lost all feeling in his left side. but he is a remarkable man and at 91 has recovered sufficiently to be allowed back home (reconstructed by my mother's partner to take wheelchairs) and he continues to work from home for his family electrical engineering business and flirt with female visitors . he has also been diagnosed with an inoperable aneurism so we will lose him sooner than later. this year because of all this i've seen much more of him and that has been a plus. but its put a heavy strain on my mother and very much coloured her year.

but apart from some stresses at work and an ongoing concern about the future of my position (which will hopefully be resolved in the spring) most of the rest of the year has been positive. what are my highlights?

my book contracts - i hoped for one but never expected two: that's 2008/9 planned out for me!
discovering cambridge united and arsenal's renewed and surpising vigour following the departure of mon. henry
going back to Skye, finding Raasay (the picture i use for my blog page) and climbing bruach na frithe in the cuillin - 3,143 feet up in air -fanatstic!
seeing sea eagles close up in scotland and hundreds of puffins on skoma in pembrokeshire
getting my flat back after J left and getting to know the rats
seeing the sex pistols at the academy and then trying to lecture the next day - rock'n'roll!
having my bike stolen - because the insurance allowed me to buy a much better one
meeting the bouncing muppetter and renewing contact with SheWho (despite all the emotional heartache both gave me)
and last, but not least, writing this blog and meeting so many lovely people and reading their thoughts on life

tomorrow i might try and set down some goals/aims/thoughts for 2008 (if im not too hungover) in the meantime i wish you all a very happy new year and i hope 2008 is the best ever for all of us
x

i obviously made the right decision in going out and leaving arsenal to win the game without my psychic assistance: if i'd stayed and watched i would have seen (cos ive seen it this morning on the rerun) a lacklustre first half display where we did nothing but concede a sloppy goal - the first of bendtner's several mistakes in his full premiership debut. dinner was really nice, good food, good company and good wine. i got home in time to watch MOTD then straight to bed. arsenal's second half was curious. within a couple of munites we were level with a long ball to eduardo who coolly slid the ball past the everton keeper. then we went ahead just after the hour with more brilliance (with a hint of handball) from the crozillian. honestly we still didn't look great but two moments of calm skill showed why wenger thinks da silva can be the surprise package of 2008. then madness and red mists descended on the game. first with the arsenal bench trying to sub him bendtner (who had been booked for a stupid petulant shove in the first half) launched into a dangerous grim tackle on andrew johnson and rightly got his second yellow and was off. he was lucky it wasn't a straight red. so off comes eduardo for ade and was thus denied the chance of a hattrick. five minutes later everton are 3-1 down as the togonator takes advantage of a comical mix up between tim howard and yobo to score into an open net. 3 points in the bag when at half time i would have settled for a draw. then arteta (great player) raises an elbow to his best mate cesc and gets sent off. cue group melee and toure going beserk (thank goodness eboue was left in london!). arteta off, cesc and flamini soon booked so on comes rosicky for fabregas and with 3 minutes of injury time on the clock the czech scores. note, he only scores when it doesn't matter - he needs to start scoring goals to win games - like bobby pires used to. anyway 4-1 to arsenal, united lost so we are top again. brilliant results if not a brilliant performance.

im taking a friend out tonight to cheer her up - we are seeing Bee Movie (i hope its better than it looks..) and this morning i learn that another friend ive neglected has had a crap year. 2008 needs to be a big improvement for a lot of my friends - its not been bad for me and i might review it later/tomorrow - be interested to know what your highlights/lowlights of the year were blogsters

oops i seem to have knocked over the water never mind plenty of peas in it!

saturday morning task is (after the guardian and breakfast of course..) to clean out the rats. this involves getting their rabbit run (well they dont make rat runs..cept in big city streets i spose) down from on top of the warderobe without knocking over the xmas tree and putting down a layer of newspaper (last week's news is this week's rat toilet paper). then i have to haul them out of their cosy bed and let them have a sniff around me and the room before popping them in temporary storage while i clean out the aquarium and cage. this involves a lot of washing and drying and is the only time i wear rubber gloves (which i hate .. i hate rubber..sorry Antlady )

meanwhile albert has taken 2 seconds to find the water bowl with frozen peas in: he's supposed to bob for peas like kids do with apples at halloween.. err albert being albert just upended it and left water and peas all over the place now their place is properly dry i can fill it with shredded paper.. (last months bills are this week's rat bedding..), i even washed their wooden hut things and those are out in the garden drying in the cool air.

i have a dilemma today: ex is coming for lunch at half one, then arsenal are playing at 5.15 and other ex wants me to come to dinner at 5.30. i could go later and miss dinner but will also miss other guests who have a 11 year old daughter they want to get home to bed early. i think i should skip the footie, after all i traipsed to the pub to watch the portsmouth game and that was awful. i can watch the highlights later (if there are any) and the whole game is on again tomorrow on setanta... i know what my gooner friend would say but what about the rest of you?

why is it that when you haul yourself all the way into work and boot up your computer that you find that the network that stores all your files (make sure you store them here they are MUCH safer they tell you..) has disappeared..no trace.. n'existe plus.. so i might have well have stayed here and used the 3/4 of the files that i have on my various memory sticks. problem is that i need the remaining 25% sometim soon and our IT department is about as much use as the proberbial chocolate teapot. ho hum. will struggle to write a lecture on violence (not that aimed at IT folk but its tempting...) then give in and go to the sales - better than trying to go tomorrow morning

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr i just wish that for once everything IT related in our institution would work when i need it to.. is that too much to ask?

had to come back and blog some more while i download yet more CDs..

antlady has already blogged on the murder of benazir bhutto but now i've been listening to nothing but that news i feel like saying something too. i dont know much about pakistan or her politics but this seems like another move to get rid of a moderate voice who (although flawed in many ways - power hungry, populist, facing corruption charges) was prepared to bravely stand up against those people who dont seem to have the word 'tolerance' in their dictionaries. at what point do we have to act against religious fanatics wherever we find them? after all george dubya is a puppet of the religious right in the states, bliar nailed his beliefs to his chest throughout his premiership and now has come out as an RC. america's chums the saudis have been allowed to let religion trample women's rights for decades.

this is not an attack on islam or christianity but just take a deco around the globe and look at the trouble spots and wars and persecutions and genocides. nazism, northern ireland, iran, afghanistan, yugoslavia (as was)... and how far back do you want to go? reformation, crusades, palestine? britain is now a secular country - we have had a bloody civil war and religious strife from the 1500s to the eighteenth century - will no one learn anything at all from history? live and let live, what does it matter if someone eats pork, believes in god or not, has sex before marriage, works on a holy day, prays to allah, jesus, the buddha, krishna, thor or luke skywalker for that matter? it doesn't - people can believe what they like so long as they don't insist that i believe it too

its time for a new crusade (sic) make intolerance history.. come on sir bob and st bono lets get on it !

well i made it back from the borders and delighted that the satnav that so many people think is license to take the piss got me home by a route ive never used a good 20 minutes earlier than ive ever done that journey before. boxing day with mum and partner, brother and wife and neice was nice expect for the tiredness creeping up on me and the arsenal misfiring by the sea side. also i have SheWho texting me from miami, then belize then mexico over the last few days telling me how hot it is and how much fun she is having.. and puzzled at why i hadn't replied mmmmm think on it girl think on it..

rats are play fighting and seem pretty lively for a change - they haven't had a xmas blowout like some of us nor have they had any of the drama/traumas that some of you seem to have had to put up with. its been ok so far for me but a bit flat - ive had no one to spoil this year which is the first time for three or four years and that is a bit hard. i did get to play games with and read stories to my neice and she is delightful and seems to have decided i am her fun uncle.. but its not quite the same. then again im much luckier than some/most so im not going to feel sorry for myself (for long anyway)

cambridge beat the locals (histon) in the first of three holiday period games so that was worth a cheer and i might try and get over to a game there in the next two weeks. this weekend i have the most recent ex coming for lunch on saturday then im going for dinner with the last ex (and two friends one of whom is her ex before me.. confused?) before that i need to try and write another lecture and prepare a seminar or two and write some essay questions. if i get that done today and tomorrow i think i will feel better. right now though i need to eat (but not to drinkD)

nice xmas lunch with an ex and her friends - stayed sober and behaved myself (that's 2 days in a row that ive kept my counsel..well done me!) Finally cracked just now and sent the muppeteer a cheery message because for amongst all the texts ive had today none were from her hoping the travellers will return before long and in the meantime im going to watch the dr who special in a bit and enjoy a festive glass or two. tommorow its nearly three hours of driving to see me ma and other sibling and then 3 hours back on the following day. i trust all of you have enjoyed your day notably those who had to cope with families and hordes of children - i really hope your efforts were appreciated

well its just about arrived - xmas eve with all its expectation and excitement. im off to visit a brother and his intended for lunch before probably settling down for more wine with the travellers later. one of those is out shopping for xmas gifts as i write (now which one do you think that might be...the male or the female..? hmmmm)

to my left the rats (oblivious to the festive season) are chomping on nuggets and albert is now chewing paper.. and to my right is a large pile of books that remind me what i should be doing over the next two weeks when im sober

anyway have a really great christmas day/boxing whatsit and see you all soon
x

long boozy lunch for me and the travellers - ah well tis the season to be merry. the rats are now munching on leftover broccoli and im contemplating what to do with the rest of the evening... finally finished jake arnott's long firm trilogy, which started well but ended in disapointment. now embarked on pullman's northern lights for the second time - not seen the film yet - and just as captivated as i was first time.
can i also just say - how lucky were united today?

just back from the pub and delighted that arsenal beat the spuds despite not playing as well as we can - sperz were surprisingly solid in the first half but adebayor scored in a beautiful move as the second half opened. 1-0 to the arsenal! then berbatov scored an individual wonder goal that no one had much chance with before toure cippled him in the area and it all looked bleak. but dear old robbie keane - who would have won champions medlas if he had played for a decent side - allowed alumina to make a great stop. defoe and bendtner came on and the latter scored with a brilliant header - his first touch 2-1 to us! that's how it ended, very close game. oneday ramos might win oneday but not today

one distasteful moment in the pub when a spud celebrating his 40th birthday with his young children decided to sing a song about arsene wenger being a paedophile - i told him off, no need for that mate - he said every need you gotta problem? in front of his kids what an example eh? as long as there are tosspots like that following football it will continue to be seen as a boorish game for boorish people. banter is fine but calling decent people paedophiles is not. and if you are wondering whether im am writing with red and white blinkers on... when i used to stand at highbury i always took issue with racists and never joined in the anti-semitic chants aimed at spurs fans. love arsenal hate tottenham but keep it to football.

here i am them - feeling happy that I seem to have sorted out week two of the module. goodness knows what i was doing three years ago when i wrote the original lecture but it makes much more sense now. i think - to be fair to myself - i have got better at articulating themes than i was. so this lecture deals with the poverty of east london in the late 19th century and with how some commentators used the squalor of the poorest to make political capital and to sell papers. ive drawn quite heavily on contemporary discourses to illustarte this and then i want the studenst to use these plus booth's wonderful poverty maps of london to explore the tensions between poor and rich in the 1880s. will it work? who knows?

i think that is enough work for this week and especially since today is the 21st and really a more traditonal pagan festival than the usurper that is christmas. so happy solstice to all of you! tomorrow is the north london derby - never a game i really look forward to despite the fact that under arsene we have had much the better of it. ramos has made sperz a better side but its at the emirates, we have a full squad to pick from so lets keep all those digits crossed that things go well.

i now need to go and learn spanish so i can understand SharitoMar's bloggings...

celtic vs barca
lyon vs man utd
shalke vs porto
liverpool vs inter
roma vs real madrid
arsenal vs milan
olympiakos vs chelsea
fenabache vs servilla

tough draw but milan aren't doing so well this season so you never know - c'mon you gunners!

so the government are contemplating two more stupid pieces of legislation (or at least policy measures), why am i not surprised?

they are thinking of making prostitution and using prostitutes illegal - to solve the problem of people trafficking. well its a laudable intention even if it is frankly impossible. there have been literally hundreds of attempts to stop prostitution in england dating abck to anglo-saxon times. just staying in the last 300 years there were iniatives to take women off the streets and close down brothels in the 1700s - the efforts of the reformation of manners movements failed. in the nineteenth century local groups tried again - and failed. the government passed the contagious diseases acts to round up and forcibly examine prostitutes - that failed. in the 1880s a campaign to close down brothels (again) forced the woemn of london onto the streets and into the arms of the ripper.. throughout the last century and this there are continual efforts to target pimps, kerb crawlers, the women - all to no good effect. prostitution is with us, its a fact of our society. people trafficking however is something we can do something about if we had more and better border controls, a dedicated and properly financed police and vice squad, and more safe houses for the victims. all these cost money. outlawing prostitution and then doing nothing about it is free.

so to the second bag of government wind...

mobile phone users who are caught driving dangerously whilst using their phones will face up to 2 years in gaol if convicted. well at the moment you can get a £60 fine and 3 points on your licence. but how many people take any notice? given the numbers i see talking and driving about like knobheads it must be very few. so we either need more traffic cops (err bit expensive that one mate..) or yet more cameras (no ta) or more education and a change of public attitudes so we regard people who phone and drive as dangerous potential killers no better than scumbag drink drivers. i would simply take away the licence from anyone caught using their phone. no excuses no warning. if it rings ignore it. its not complicated is it?

got quite a lot done today as the only historian on campus - checked off the medical essays by phone with my departing colleague (agreed on most them and only failed one in the end, gave out four As - his parting gift to the good students). then sorted all the admin around that - grades to the programme support team and such like. will give them back in the first session of the new term.. which i sorted out as well. finished my lecture on london in the 1880s and a thematic outline of the module. that should occupy the first hour or so of the session. then we can have some discussion, a break, their essays and evaluations of last term before i split them into two smaller groups for seminars. over the hols ive asked them to create a physical or mental picture of jack the ripper so we can discuss the mythologising of the murders. that should be fun if they do the work - tiresome if they don't. then there will be a little bit of explanation of the structure, sorting out of reading, further sub division of them into groups of 3-4 for the term and expectations (mine) of them. given that i taught this lot last year and they were - generally - a nice bunch, enthusiastic but a little lazy - i will try and lay down the law in week one. whether they will take any notice though is to be seen

after all that work i settled down to continue trawling through the victorian press looking for murder stories.. this is brief sampler of the sort of thing i was doing

police news was a large format paper that reported crime (naturally) with big picture stories and closely spaced text on the inside pages. the pictures are better than photos really because sometimes they show the imagined happenings where modern photo journalism just gives us the aftermath.

this one caught my eye - i doubt we would have something so vivid on the front page of our papers today.

i am going to download several stories then use them as seminar material - different reports of the same crimes from a variety of sources

anyway enough already.. i am supposed to be going out for xmas drinks with two friends tonight but its freezing cold brrrrrrr and the pub we've chosen is miles away. might have to try and reorganise it closer (the meeting not the pub..)

not an obvious link I'll grant you but it merely reflects the fact that i have - since popping to the supermarket for more ingredients for tonight (which has now expanded to three persons) - managed to mark another five essays all on the impact and significance of cholera outbreaks. very good stuff in general, 2 firsts a 2.1 and a 2.2 and just one slacker (but she is always lazy writes it on the bus sort of girl.. no good will come of her mark my words children..). oh and i am continuing to load music onto my mac and im up to joy division. still ahven't seen that film - anyone know if its any good?

ok the next three were better.. not much but at least they answered the question.. on to the last 10 now (not on sex thank goodness)

just read 4 essays all on sex and reproduction in the victorian era - all badly written, innaccurate, off the point and poorly researched. just about passed two but cant pass the other two. i hate failing students - makes me feel like a total b*d but what can you do? got three more to read on the same topic.. i'll let you know if they are any better

baden powell would have been proud: arsenal's youngsters (average age 19) drove past a rejuvenated blackburn rovers to reach the semi-finals of the league (carling) cup. we started brightly running in 2 gaols from diaby and eduardo without the home team really waking up. mark hughes must have been fuming on the sidelines this was such a limp and un-blackburn like performance. then a dubious off side decision allowed rocky santa claus to give rovers a sniff of something before half-time. hughes did his work in the dressing room and rovers were back to their usual ugly but effective (and not unskillful) selves. father christmas got a second and then it looked as if they might sneak it. we had our chances and the game was heading for extra time when denilson (who looks about 12 ) chopped dunn and got (rightly) sent off. now this is where the mafeking spirit rose to the surface. the ten boys from north london (well paris, rio, lyon, amsterdam etc) held on and with five minutes to go eduardo was put through by the excellent song and he calmly shot past friedal to win the tie. bazarite went off on a stretcher with a dislocated shoulder and several players went down with cramp. it was a fighting performance and really speaks volumes about both the depth of arsenal's squad and the determination and mental strength of these so-called 'kids'. if wenger has a spare afternoon anytime it might be worth the FA's while to ask him to set up a school of excellence for young england players on the lines of the arsenal one. blackburn are a very good very strong team and hughes is no mug but a team of teenagers - none of whom are likely to start against the spuds on saturday - outclassed them for 30 minutes and then outfought them for another 30.

today im back to marking the second half of these essasy and getting ready for the evening - oh and getting a few more xmas cards

the thespian would like some nuggets from the 19th century papers and i will try and dig some out tommorrow if the computers at work let me

its cold and i couldn't find big figs only baby figs.. still she'll have to make do with them. im entertaining tomorrow - not the muppeteer nor SheWho - in fact no one romantically so im just practising instead (hence the figs). off out in a bit - so cold i might hop in the bath instead of showering for a change - its a bit of a faff but it will warm up me toes.

made progress but didn't finish the lecture today - spent the afternoon reading newspapers from the 1890s - they were MUCH better then, funny and sharper, with great pictures of london life. bet it was even colder then though brrrrrrrrrrrrrr

i definately had too much to dream last night.. i'm not sure what brought it on but i was travelling on a coach/train somewhere north and on my own but i had made friends with a fellow passenger. i think something was wrong - outside the coach perhaps but we arrived much earlier than i expected. this disorientated me leaving me confused and anxious. in reality i woke up several times at my friends house but kept being dragged back into the same dream - that doesn't happen very often to me and it was a relief when paul eventually appeared with a cup of coffee (which i almost immediately sent flying ) i drove home in a bit of a daze and im only just getting my head back together.

i hate dreams like that - i think they are important but i can never remember enough to make any sense of it - paul and i had quite intense discussions about all sorts of stuff and we did have a few drinks but nothing excessive. oh well. now im tired and have to try and get myself fired up to write a lecture - not easy. tonight im going round to see SheWho to watch football and eat nice food. lets hope i have a dream free night tonight.

well good morning to you all in what is the first day of my winter break. ive already been to the dentist this morning (just a check up not too bad.. have an appointment for a deep clean next year - the legacy of years of smoking before i reformed). at first (it being so early) i failed to notice that my dentist had changed. mainly because they seem to have a supply of gorgeous brown eyed middle eastern teeth specialists. being tipped on your back and prodded has never been so much fun

now i am about to embark on a day of marking essays - well double marking in fact as these are 3rd years taking my colleague's module. we both mark then discuss them and agree grades - usually we are pretty close or spot on but sometimes grades are a bit out. i tend to give in to him on his module (he knows the subject best after all) and vice versa. anyway there are about 30 of them and that means, at roughly 4 an hour, 7-8 hours. then im going over to stay with the towcestrians so paul and i can have a few beers rather than our usual hour of exercise. i might also pop in to oddbins to buy some nice christmas wine.

finally a few words on 'super sunday' or 'galactic sunday' or whatever the press were calling it: first i thought liverpool were poor, benitez (again) got it all wrong and united never really looked in any trouble. the supremely unattractive ferdinand was impressive in defence and even if united hardly looked much going forward they stopped liverpool playing. that said St. rafa doesn't seem to know how to change a game. on comes babel but off goes kewell, then he replaces kuyt with crouch. same difference. surely when you losing to your biggest rivals and in danger of slipping out of the title race you go for it - take off a defender or benayoun? oh well

Over at the real home of football arsenal put chelski to the sword. ok so it was close and blues fans could argue that they had host of chances but then so did we. i have no idea why the togonator's 'goal' was ruled out for his struggle with ben haim - it seemed fair to me and typical of what dogbreath used to do to swiss tony every time they played us. the lack of the drogbeast and essian and the presence of hleb and flamini (and cesc but not so much) made the difference. gallas' goal was brilliant and almunia played a blinder. cashly got boed, kicked, beaten for pace and skill, kicked some more, booed again and a ball boy threw the ball at him for good measure, then he goes and gives two fingers to the people that made him and will now be banned for life - serves him right the money grabbing cheap little toerag - i bet cheryl can't cook roast potatoes like arsene can either.

well i didn't make it to cambridge because of trying to get my car checked over, washed and valleted and fitted with a satnav device before the holidays. all that took me till nearly 2 so wouldn't have made it to the abbey. still they didn't need me running out 5-0 winners over kings lynn with goals from hoyte, leo, rendell (2) and boylan. caught the second half on the radio. looking forward to gallatic sunday down the pub tommorrow and still deciding whetehr to go to meet the singers at the local tonight.

just got downstairs from the travellers' flat - been hitting the CDs and the wine.. know I am going to regret this in the morning (and i dont mean the CDs)

in a nicely relaxed state for two reasons: just returned from my accupuncture session which always calms me down. i used to hate needles but these are much easier to cope with - its also a cultural exchange talking to my chinese doctor who obviously still finds the british a little odd. and of course it is the end of term - schools aren't out but uni is. had the last set of presentations this morning, not as good as last week and including another favourite student who seems determined to get a 2:2 through a lazy attitude when her mind is more than capable of achieving a much higher grade. its up to her but it is frustrating and there is nearly always someone like this this every year.

so now im sat here importing CDs into my itunes library so i can use my Mac as a massive ipod shuffle - i expect its possible to add some synchronised imagery for a real party feel! not sure if im technologically adept enough to work that one out though It means that now it is playing through all my albums as they go on - starting with ac/dc so im not in a particularly 'new man' mode at the moment!

actually finsihed christmas shopping this afternoon as i had to pop into the darkest depths of our wonderful town centre to see the new property management company (who seem fine if a little impersona) - got my brother and his wife four lovely coloured cocktail glasses which i thought was suitably decadent for a couple that have enough money to buy any necessity with ease.

might drive over to see the mighty U's play kings lynn in the trophy tommorrow but i better wrap up warm as its going to be bitter on those exposed terraces!

well we are nearly there, the end of term. today i had my final session with the second years - lecture followed by a quiz (with prizes!) instead of trying to make them work too hard. got the evaluations of the module so far which, like the ones from tuesday - first years - were pretty all positive. some of them say really nice things and after a couple of difficult days in my headspace that was really needed. the flip side of the end of term is that i will have no contact with students or most of my colleagues for three weeks - i wonder who i will miss most?

i found this on utube via myles palmer's arsenal blog - it is just so funny (as long as you are not a s@*rs fan

anyway back to news etc. i got quite cross yesterday about the way i felt the bouncing muppeteer was avoiding me and refusing to commit to even a quick coffee sometime soon. today she emailed me with brief explanations - ok, but i decided to ignore her for a bit. i can do hard to get as well and right now the last thing i need is a woman who wants to muck around with my emotions. so softly softly catchy monkey (or whatever they say) - i wont be the next person to blink

hope you are all well speak soon