im in bits this morning because im waiting for an email that im not sure im going to enjoy reading. the oracle said this could be the most perfect thing but i also know it can just be a non-starter in the way id like it to be. what is wrong with me? im in my mid forties and i still react like i did when i was 20. love gets me like a case of anthrax.. i feel like a beetle on its back.. its all so horribly true. going to get my hair cut in ten minutes if i haven't heard by then i think i'll just curl up and die...